Death Row Reflection

By: Ramon Sandoval

I was eighteen years old when was arrested for felony murder with special circumstances. At twenty-one, I was found guilty of all charges. I was sentenced to be executed, and was transferred to San Quentin's Death Row.

For seventeen years I lived in an environment that had its effect on all of The Row's residents. It was hard to watch some of the men lose hope and wither away in mind, body, and spirit. Too many times taking their sentence into their own hands and committing suicide. I was determined for that to never be me; in my heart I felt that my life wasn't over. What I needed was to find solutions and not allow my mind to become pessimistic about my circumstances. Even in my darkest moments, I kept on fighting for a better tomorrow. Studying and applying the holy scripture to my life helped me transform and renew my mind, as it also gave me an even greater hope that with God, all things are possible.

Because of my good conduct I was allowed to be transfered to CCI Tehachapi, even though I'm still a condemned inmate. I am grateful for the freedom and opportunities CCI is offering me, such as being able to attend a variety of rehab programs, and to contribute by influencing others in a positive way. Now we have even established on the yard, Lives Worthy Of Purpose. A group that I am proud to be a part of because together we have been making a difference not only amongst our peers, but throughout other institutions, and outside communities, as we partake in the activities offered to us by Lives Worthy of Purpose.

I'll close off with the following, no matter what we are going through, seeing only the negative in our circumstances will get us exactly what it got us in the past: pain, problems, and prison. That mindset can never be an option for us. Possessing an optimistic mindset is the way to go, it will help us embrace positivity and the attitude of NEVER GIVE UP.

Ramon Sandoval CDC# T92424